Awkward Student Finds Love Pt 1

My dad never knew I was gay; He died before I had come to terms with it. Although he never knew, I think he would have been as supportive as my mom, shocked yes, but supportive.


Being the awkward new kid wasn’t the best thing in the world, needing to meet new people and finding your way around a new place. Not exactly a good situation when you were as socially inept as I was. However, it did have its advantages, like when you wanted to just start fresh, to leave behind the bad things in your life and open a new chapter in your book. Well that’s the position I was thrown into.

My name is Kyle Stratton and I was 20 years old at the time. I was a college sophomore who had recently moved from New York to Albuquerque. My previous school in New York closed down which meant that I had to transfer to another school. Expecting the nearby schools to have a surge of the other students looking to get a transfer, I decided to move to Albuquerque. When my dad passed away five years before he left me his house here. My parents divorced when I was still young but I managed to spend time with both of them. In my earlier years, I spent my summer vacations at my dad’s here while I spent my other times with my mom in New York. But after my dad passed away, I haven’t really had the need or want to return here.

When I first entered the suburban home, I stood there at the doorway looking at the home. It was exactly how I remembered it. The stone fireplace in the living room stood against hardwood walls, the hideous brown couch sat in front of it. Oh how I hated that couch but I didn’t throw it away seeing that it reminded me of my dad. The kitchen was quite large, owing the fact that my dad loved to cook. I remembered how he made home cooked meals everyday while I visited. Never once did he want us to eat out and I really prized that. My dad was an excellent cook and his cooking was literally to die for. He was really the best dad I could ever have. He owned an auto shop so during the summers he would always make sure he spent his waking moments with me. On the few occasions that he absolutely needed to go to work, he would try to take me along, which he did except for a few rare occasions. Now all those summers feels like too short a time. I really missed him.

My dad never knew I was gay; He died before I had come to terms with it. Although he never knew, I think he would have been as supportive as my mom, shocked yes, but supportive. My mom is also another awesome person. Being a single mom can’t be easy especially when your son turns out to be gay. If not for my mom and a couple of close friends I had, I think wouldn’t have made it through high school. When I came out as a junior in high school, I was, of course, teased for it. My ‘friends’ alienated me but at least had the decency not to taunt me, but settled with pretending I didn’t exist. The two friends who didn’t abandon me helped me through it, always telling the people who teased me off. Eventually the teasing stopped, especially when we went to college but people still avoided me like I’m some sort of disease. So moving was kind of a bittersweet thing. I had to leave my friends but I would be going somewhere where no one would label me as the gay guy. I wasn’t effeminate so as long as I didn’t make it too obvious I fancied guys to girls, no one would know.

So that first day of school, I would have been lying if I said I wasn’t nervous. I was and am what you would call socially handicapped and it’s just a pain for me to meet new people, the ability of speech totally leaving me. The biggest pain about that is that people always seem to come up to talk to me for some reason unknown to myself. I’ve always felt it’s like the universe playing a practical joke on me. Sarah, one of my friends back at New York, says it’s because I’m cute but I never saw it. I mean I was a somewhat skinny lad, 5’11”. I hated exercise so my body wasn’t what you would have called the epitome of perfection. Sarah always begged to differ though, saying she would have dated me if not for the fact that I was gay.

So anyway, I went to my classes that first day. Each teacher that saw me asked me to introduce myself and I choked when all the eyes fell upon me. One class in particular was extremely embarrassing. I walked into the room and it was empty apart from one guy sitting at his desk, concentration focussed on the book in his hands. This guy was, to say the least, a living Adonis. I stood there examining him, his attention on his book. He had short black hair, which fell over his forehead, touching his eyebrows highlighting his deep brown eyes. A perfectly shaped nose sat above his lips, which were pursed in concentration. My eyes headed down to his arms, which were buff. Not freakishly big but a nice proportionate size. My eyes traced the vein down his bicep to the hand holding the book. I pulled my eyes away when I heard other students coming and walked to the back of the class, taking a seat there.

I went back to examining the god in the front of the class. He was wearing a black muscle t-shirt which outlined the shape of his body. Tight muscles on his back accentuated his broad shoulders. I pulled me eyes away as more students came in. A look of confusion crossed their face when they saw me, but smiled when they figured out that I was new and I awkwardly returned one. The class was almost full when the professor came in. I looked at him and he caught my eye at the same time.

“Ah you must be the new student.” He said, placing his briefcase on his table. At his words, heads turned to look at me. I blushed under the attention. It was times like this that I hated that I was this shy. “Well introduce yourself then.” Came the voice of the professor.

“Oh uh…Kyle. Kyle Stratton.” I choked out. My eyes met with Adonis. Aside from the look of curiosity he had, much like everyone else, there was something else there. Something I could not figure out.

“Well then welcome Mr Stratton. I’m Mr Johnson.” He said and went back to setting up his laptop. A few students surrounding me welcomed me and introduced themselves as well. I simply smiled and nodded thanks. A pair of eyes lingered on me though, and I looked into those brown orbs. He still had that curious look in his eyes. It felt a little uneasy though when he continued to stare. I averted my gaze and pretended not to notice but I could still feel his gaze on me.

“Mr Hanson, could you help me with this? You know how I am with computers.” said Mr Johnson. At this Adonis broke his stare and got up, walking up to the teacher’s desk. So now I knew his last name. Hanson. As he helped Mr Johnson with his laptop, I finally had a whole view of him. He was roughly 6’2″ tall and you could see how fit he was. He had a well-developed chest, his t-shirt stretching over it. I could only imagine the abs beneath his shirt. I mentally slapped myself and looked down, ignoring the increasing blood flow to my groin. I avoided looking up at all costs. This wasn’t like me. I didn’t go drooling over guys like this, especially not someone whom I just met.

Hanson finally went back to his seat and I tried my hardest to pay attention in class, shaking my head every time my thoughts drifted to Hanson. It was a good thing I was siting in the back of the class or someone might have thought I was crazy, shaking my head every few minutes. After a torturous hour, the class was finally over. I preoccupied myself with packing my stuff and didn’t even notice Hanson leaving until I looked up and half the class including him was gone. I sighed, half due to relief and half due to exasperation. I don’t know what had come over me. I mean there were hot guys around before but I never had this wanting feeling like I had with Hanson. Hell I didn’t even know his first name, let alone if he was even gay. I was glad that that had been the last class of the day for me and I could go home, putting the thought of Hanson in the back of my mind, or so I thought I would.

On the bus ride home I kept thinking about him, thoughts that would have made my mom cringe. I convinced myself that my lust was only due to the fact that I haven’t had a release in so long and my body was just crying out for some sort of outlet for the pent up sexual tension. The last boyfriend I had was back in New York over six months back. We parted on mutual grounds, feeling that the relationship wasn’t going anywhere. That doesn’t mean that my body doesn’t miss having someone to hold, especially now when I’m so far from the people whom I’ve grown to care for so much. By the time I alighted, I forgot about trying to keep my mind off Hanson, thinking that a good wank that night would make me forget about him.

But when I rounded the corner to my home, I totally forgot about Hanson, my thoughts now focused on the car in my driveway. Since I had moved here I haven’t had a chance to buy a car yet so as of this morning, my driveway had been empty. I walked up my porch, eyeing the car suspiciously. I wasn’t expecting anyone and I wondered who could be sneaking around my house now. Just as I was about to enter the front door, I heard noises coming from inside. I froze, hand on the doorknob. Whoever it was, he was in my house. I turned the knob and found it to be unlocked. There was no sign of a forced entry and I slowly pushed the door open.

I could hear the sound of the kitchen cabinets opening and closing and immediately thought it was a burglar. I grabbed a candleholder on the side table and held it up, ready to strike should someone attack me. I inched closer to the kitchen, trying to catch a glimpse of the burglar. Before I could round the corner into my kitchen, someone walked out suddenly and shouted when he spotted me. Only thing was that he didn’t look like a burglar. I took in the shocked face standing there and realized it wasn’t even a ‘him’. Stood there, face pale with fear, was a woman, probably in her early fifties. I realized how scary it must have been for a lady to see some guy carrying a metal object in his hand, in a position to knock you out.

“Who are you?” I asked, not lowering the makeshift weapon still held up. She didn’t speak, her hand on her chest, obviously trying to calm her furiously beating heart. I felt a tinge of guilt for scaring her so bad, but I kinda needed to know what this woman was doing in my house. He eyes moved to my face and she paused, her face contorted with thought.

“Kyle? Is that you?” She asked as took a closer look at me, her eyes squinting behind her glasses.

“Um…do I know you?” I raised my eyebrow, racking my brain for any memory of this lady and how she knew me.

“I’m Mrs Kent. I don’t think you would remember me. I was a friend of your father’s.” She said. I lowered the weapon in my hand. That name was kind of familiar. “I babysat you once when your dad had to work.”

I remembered one summer when my dad was really busy with work and he got someone to come over. “I…I think I remember. Um…so…what are you doing here?” I asked, putting down the décor in my hand.

“Oh, I come here once a fortnight to keep the place clean, a favour to your dad. He had left me a note and key, asking me to keep the house in shape until you were old enough to decide what to do with it. But anyway, I didn’t know you were back in town. I haven’t seen you in so long.” She said. I thought about it and it never occurred to me that the house was so clean after five years of vacancy. I guess I knew the reason now.

“Yeah, I moved back just a few days ago. I’m attending college at Albuquerque Tech now.” I said.

“Ah, I see. I was wondering whose stuff it was in the bedroom. I thought the house was sold or something. It’s so good to see you again.” She came over and gave me a warm hug. I returned one in kind. She reminded me a lot of my father, same personality and everything. “So seeing that you are back in town, do you still want me to come over to clean up occasionally? It’s no problem if you do.”

“Thanks Mrs Kent but I think I can manage.” I replied, giving her a smile.

“Alright. It’s good that someone’s living here again. This house used to be so lively.” She said.

“Yeah it’s good to be back too. I would offer you a drink but I haven’t bought anything yet.” I said sheepishly.

“It’s all right son. I was just on my way out too.” She said and made her way to the door. “Well it’s been a pleasure Kyle.”

“Same here. Thanks by the way, for keeping this place clean.” I said, walking her to the door.

“No problem hun. Your father was a great friend. It was the least I could do.” She said and exited the house. “If you ever want a home cooked meal or anything, just give me a call. I left my number on the kitchen board.”

“Thanks Mr Kent. Will do.” I said my goodbyes and closed the door. I looked at the clock on the wall. 6.30pm. It was still a little early so I wasn’t going out for dinner yet. Proceeding to the living room I threw myself down on the couch. First day of school and already I was feeling exhausted. I thought about everything that day, classes, the school, and the people I met.

My thoughts wandered to Hanson, sitting in the front of the class. I shook my head and removed him from my thoughts. I didn’t like it when I became too infatuated with someone, especially someone whom I had no idea what his first name was, let alone if he was even gay. I learnt back in high school it’s best to find out if the person in question is gay or not before making a move. Lets just say that straight guys don’t always take lightly to being asked out by another guy. I especially don’t want to get on Hanson’s bad side. I’m not exactly scrawny, but I’m pretty sure I can’t stand up to Hanson. He could chew me up and spit me out.

I managed to shake him from my thoughts and just lay on the couch. I don’t know when I fell asleep but by the time I woke up it was already dark outside. I looked at the clock and saw that it was already 11pm. I sighed and figured that it was too late to go out for dinner anymore so I pulled myself off the couch and made my way upstairs to my bedroom. I felt my muscles ache from the awkward position my body was in from sleeping on the couch. That’s another reason why I hated that couch. It’s always comfortable enough to fall asleep on but when you wake up, your back feels like its about to break.

I figured a hot bath would ease my muscles so I got one ready and took a nice long soak, during which Hanson popped into my head again. I groaned, not wanting to think about him now, but my brain does things that even I sometimes don’t want. I found myself growing hard as I thought about images of him from class today, of how amazing he looked. I remembered what I was thinking this afternoon and thought that a release would take my mind off him. I started stroking myself, to images of my classmate. It didn’t take long for me to reach orgasm but there was only so much satisfaction my hand could give me. It was however enough to get my body to stop yearning for Hanson. I smiled at the realization that it was just hormones.

I sat in the water a minute more before getting out. I dried myself off and put on a pair of boxers, emptying the water in the bath before heading back to my room. I simply threw my body on my bed, mentally and physically exhausted, although I just had a 4-hour nap. I was asleep almost instantly.

Next morning I woke up with a massive headache, similar to a hangover. I looked over at the clock on my bedside table. It was 9am. Still pretty early seeing that I didn’t need to head to school till 1. I attempted to move but my body didn’t respond to what my brain told, a common occurrence when I have endless dreams in my sleep. Finally I managed to pull myself out of bed, made my way to the kitchen and got myself two tablets of aspirin.

It was then that the doorbell rang, assaulting my ears, the pounding headache amplifying every sound. I trudged to the door and opened it, seeing Mrs Kent standing there with a bag of groceries in her arms. “Morning Kyle. I got you some groceries.” She said as I moved for her to enter.

“Oh you didn’t have to. I was going to head to the store later to get them.” I said as I followed her to the kitchen.

“No problem dear. Since I’m already here, what would you like for breakfast? I can whip something up for you.”

“Thanks Mrs Kent. Anything will do.” I said.

“Geez Kyle you don’t look too good.” She said.

“I’d figured. I had a horrible night.” I took a seat at the kitchen island. I looked down and I remembered I haven’t got on anything other than my boxers. “Oh sorry about the attire Mrs Kent, I’ll go change.” I said about to get off my seat.

“Nah it’s alright. Doesn’t bother me. You get used to it when your husband does that every morning. Anyway, why didn’t you have a good night? Not used to the house yet?” Mrs Kent asked, taking a pan out of the cabinet and putting it on the stove.

“Maybe, I don’t know. I had a barrage of dreams last night.” I replied. The sound of sizzling eggs filled my ears. It was only then I realized how hungry I was, seeing that I didn’t have dinner the previous night.

“What about?” Mrs Kent asked. By this point, my mind was very distracted by the smell of the eggs. My stomach grumbled, pretty loudly if I might add. “Whoa, you must be hungry.”

“Yeah, I didn’t have dinner last night. I took a nap and overslept.” I said, rubbing my head. Mr Kent must have found it funny too since she chuckled. I started daydreaming and was pulled out of it when Mrs Kent placed a plate of food in front of me.

“There, eat up. I have to go so I shall leave you to eat. I’ll let myself out.” Mrs Kent said.

“Thanks again Mrs Kent.” I said between mouthfuls of food. She nodded her welcome and was soon out the door. I wolfed down the remainder of my food and sat there, feeling satisfied. I put the plate in the sink and got ready for school. I took a little longer getting ready than expected, wanting to look my best. I kept telling myself it was just being presentable but I knew deep down that it was just a sad attempt to have Hanson notice me. Apparently the jack off session last night provided me with such little relief that this morning, dear Mr Hanson was invading my thoughts again. So my brain kept trying to find ways of impressing Hanson. I mean, even if he wasn’t gay, I would like to get to know him, even though it’s kind of like self torture.

I looked at myself in the mirror. I wasn’t buff like Hanson but I did have some muscle. My workout basically consisted on a morning jog and some like weight training seeing as I hated exercise so much, so I wasn’t big or anything but I was proud of my body. I had short brown hair, which was always very stubborn and almost impossible to maintain. I wasn’t very handsome but I wasn’t ugly either. Just average. I just really wished that Hanson were interested too.

How An Awkward Student Finds Love Pt 2

Click on a star to rate this post

Average rating 4.2 / 5. Vote count: 55

No votes so far! Be the first to rate this post.

2 thoughts on “Awkward Student Finds Love Pt 1

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *