I started to work on Ali’s cock as Izem filled me with his tongue. My cock was thumping against my tummy, leaking precum onto the couch. I started to take Ali into my throat.
Something about anxiety makes me intensely hungry for Ali’s cock. That’s probably not the best reaction in an emergency situation. Where most would run from a burning building or take shelter under a table during an earthquake, I would look around desperately for his lap to satisfy my twitching hole.
And sure enough, as he drove me to meet up with Izem, to face the lion for whom I was originally procured, I couldn’t help myself from reaching for his hand. I sucked his finger into my mouth with an exaggerated slurping noise.
He smiled at me oddly and said to the text translator on his dashboard, “Later, little cub. After this is over I will fill you like you need. I know you are hungry for daddy.” I nodded, returning his smile, but still leaned over to put my head against his shoulder and let my hand rest on his bulge.
It was a breezy, mild night and Ali dressed me in white shorts and a black tank top with a red heart in the center. Across the heart were white letters spelling out “Ali’s Boy.” Over that he put me in a thin white hoodie to keep the chill, and Izem’s eyes, off my skin.
Ali didn’t bother with underwear, but instead wore a pair of tight black shorts that looked like business pants cut and hemmed at mid-thigh. Over them, He had on a thin, white, semi-transparent shirt that showed just enough skin to make you stare at his dark nipples. He had the sleeves pushed up to his elbows. He looked sexy as hell as it barely contained his muscles.
I was just leaning in to bite his nipple through his shirt when he pulled into a parking garage and whipped into a spot beside his father’s SUV. He turned off the engine and let out a sigh. He turned to me, lifted my chin so our eyes met and I watched his face darken and his shoulders sink.
“We will go in, be polite, exchange pleasantries. Izem will kiss you on the cheek or forehead, it is just how we greet. Our fathers will go over what is to take place and then Izem will be allowed to say his peace to you. You do not need to respond to anything at all unless I or my father directs you to. It will show your loyalty and deep respect if you look to my father when you are asked a question. He will signal you when to respond. Do you understand?” Ali said to the text translator.
I nodded and then waited for him to come and open my door. He led me to an elevator and pressed the top floor. I walked into his chest and he slid his arms around me, looking down at me with an unconvincing smile.
The doors opened to a wide lobby with black marble floors and a wall of windows overlooking the darkened sky. Ali took my hand and led me across the floor and through two glass doors. Down a long corridor of cubicle offices and around a corner was a long, glass-walled conference room. I saw three men waiting for us around a large metal table. Behind them was a wall of windows and I could see the million little city lights that stretched from the sea to the hills.
Izem stood with a smile when he saw me. He had on a tight blue polo shirt that hugged his muscles nicely and was unbuttoned to show a furry chest peeking out. He had on khaki shorts that were also tight, showing his hard ass and strong thighs. His furry legs looked like Ali’s, but his skin was a few shades lighter.
We stared at each other for a moment and a hopeful smile crept across his face. He knew I was impressed with his body, it was like someone had made a replica of Ali but used lighter paint. But his face was different. His nose smaller, eyes not quite as wide, smile warmer, height a little taller. I felt a pang of guilt for making a mental comparison chart between the two.
Ali pushed me in front of him and towards a man I didn’t know. It must have been Izem’s father. He seemed young, very fit, had beautiful green eyes. I reached a hand towards him to shake, but he pulled me in for a hug and kissed me on each cheek. He smiled at me warmly as he half released me. I felt a strange buzz between us like we’d met before. My head relaxed against his shoulder before he let me go.
Izem came towards me next. He put his hands on my shoulder and looked me up and down slowly with a slight look of frustration. He looked past my shoulder and said something not meant for me. I turned to look at Ali just as Izem pulled me in for a hug. He was taller than Ali and my head fit right against his shoulder. He kissed the top of my head and I looked up to see his lips moving, still talking to someone.
I looked back at Ali as Izem released me. His fists balled at his side and he was looking away. His eyes turned back to me with an icy glare. Our eyes locked and his glare melted away. He saw my eyes, knew how uncomfortable, scared, anxious I was. I wanted to go to the car right now and go home.
“I go home please,” I signed to him and his eyes sank with guilt.
“Sorry, can’t right now,” he signed back to me and ended with “I love you.”
I nodded, understanding.
The two older men took seats along the side of the table closest to the wall. Izem would be at the head. He pulled out the seat next to his and offered it to me. But Ali came from behind me and put an arm across my stomach, pulling me away and down into his lap as he sank into the next chair over.
Now it was Izem’s turn to fume as Ali pulled me back against his chest and put his chin on my shoulder and his arms tight around my waist. It didn’t feel good to me at that moment. I loved his attention and would normally beg for it. But here in this war with Izem it seemed less about love and more about spite, ownership, a trophy.
Izem set up a tablet on a little easel on the tabletop in front of me. He hit a few little buttons and a blue screen popped up.
“This is so you can understand everything. Is it working?” Izem asked and his words danced across the screen. I nodded and he smiled at me like he’d done something special by including me in a conversation about my life.
Dr. Hamad spoke then. He went over everything Ali had told me about what would happen here. He asked if I understood and I nodded again, but he said I have to actually state yes or no.
“Yeh,” I croaked out and got an adoring look from Izem. I felt Ali’s body tighten his grip on mine. Speaking was something I only did in private with him and even then it was a rare occasion. I felt his heart thumping against my back.
“Ok then, if you have no more questions then we will leave you two to it. right?” Dr. Hamad said to the room and his gaze looked threateningly towards Ali. He knew Ali didn’t want to leave me here and I didn’t really want to be left.
The two older men moved towards the door and Ali turned me in his lap to face him. “Ok?” he signed. I shrugged, not sure how to answer that. I wanted this whole thing over with and I knew the best way to end this for good was to do it cleanly, bite the bullet. I didn’t want anyone else getting hurt. It was time to give the crazy man what he wanted.
I nodded reluctantly and started to push myself off of his lap, but his arms held me one last time. Instead of letting me go, he stood and hugged me to his chest, kissing me dramatically and overemphasizing how great his control and care was.
He finally set me down and I looked past his shoulder to see his father looking at him angrily. It was time to go. Ali looked down into my eyes and kissed my forehead gently. “My baby,” he mouthed.
One last glare of warning to Izem, a few threats in Arabic, and then he left.
I was halfway between the door and Izem. I turned to see Ali leave and through the glass I watched him take a seat with Dr. Hamad and Izem’s father. They were all watching us expectantly. I felt like a new tiger at the zoo behind a thick glass wall.
I had a quick second thought about all this, and put my palm towards the glass and Ali jumped up ready to rescue me and said something to his father. Dr. Hamad shook his head while keeping his eyes ahead and simply reached for his wrist and pulled him back down to take a seat.
I swallowed hard and felt a chill in the room. I hugged my hoodie around me and turned to see Izem looking at me nervously. He pointed to the seat next to him and signed, “please… sit.” He didn’t seem as scary or harsh as the first time I’d met him, the time he put his hands on me and scolded me for not being submissive to my lion. It wasn’t an order. It was an invitation. I nodded and slid in hesitantly.
Izem slid the tablet closer so he could see it. “You are scared of me?” he asked.
I nodded and typed, “Yes sir. Very much so. You were mean the first time we met.” I admitted more than I should have, but with these men there was no need to pretend I had any power. Like a duck says “quack,” it was assumed that I was helpless here.
“That’s not how I wanted things to go. I am sorry for that meeting. I was angry and knew he had twisted everything. He’d lied to us both. I’m sure he has told you all kinds of bad things about me, but please promise to listen and really think about what I say. Can you promise me that, sweet boy?” Izem said to the tablet.
I nodded again, feeling a slight relaxation set in as his lips spread to a warm smile.
Izem pulled out a white cardboard file box and set it on the table next to him. He opened it and took out a file and showed me papers.
“This is my file on you. I had investigators put it together when we first found you. I was so sad to read everything that had happened to you. I wanted so much to help your situation. It’s why I got you the scholarship and picked out clothes for you for here at the university.” Izem began.
“You did all that? I thought it was just part of the program. No wonder my roommate seemed so jealous of everything I got. I thought it was just the standard deal everyone on scholarship had. You did all that?” I typed.
“Of course! I wanted you to be without worry for anything. I wanted you to be a normal college kid. I wanted you to make friends, be goofy, sneak alcohol, do what goofy kids your age should do. I did it so you could see what it felt like to just focus on your studies without a worry in the world. Then when you found me you could choose me… I’d hoped,” Izem said and reached across the table where my hand rested.
“I wanted so much for you, Emi. Your school records showed you had so much promise in writing and the arts. Are you doing anything with that? You have gifts that need to be developed. Are you even going to classes anymore?”
“I… yes, somewhat. Ali had to fix my classes for me so I could pass,” I admitted.
“You didn’t need that, you are perfectly brilliant. You just needed to be on campus and focused. You have so much potential and I wanted you to fulfill it… or at least explore it… You have a beautiful body but also a beautiful mind, Emi. You could really be somebody if he didn’t squash it,” Izem looked at me with sad eyes and reached a hand to cup my cheek. His palm was warm, a little sweaty.
Izem quickly turned his head to the side and I followed his gaze to see Ali right up against the glass pointing a finger at him threateningly. I remembered he said I wasn’t to be touched.
Izem rolled his eyes and gave me a half smile with a shake of his head. “He is so afraid of losing you. I guess I would be too,” he said.
“I am still taking classes. Next semester I will be back on track!” I typed defensively. I understood what he was saying, but my heart had discovered Ali. His love was worth more to me than those things.
“What makes you think he will let you? Has he even mentioned picking out classes or your degree plan? You don’t have one on file. And what about friends? By now you should be making all kinds of friends. They have other deaf students on campus. Did he tell you that? It was recommended by your counselor who you haven’t gone to see since the first week of school!” Izem said.
“I don’t really get a chance to meet other people. We’re currently very busy running from a guy who keeps trying to kidnap me,” I typed.
“I’m sorry about that. I wasn’t trying to kidnap you… But you were mine first. You were stolen from me, not from Ali. I was trying to rescue you. And when you missed your appointment with the ear specialist I thought something had happened to you. Why did you choose not to go?” Izem was getting frustrated with me.
“What ear doctor?” I typed slowly, checking over my shoulder to see Ali sitting in the other room with his arms folded and his eyes on us. Ali leaned his head towards me and signed, “you ok?” I nodded to reassure him and then turned back to Izem and the screen.
“Are you kidding me? No, of course you’re not,” Izem sighed and shook his head, eyes suddenly filling with pity. “He didn’t tell you about it at all, did he? Back when I was watching you in Los Angeles… I got your medical records and sent them to an ear specialist in Geneva. He said there is a new surgery that might correct your hearing. It’s still new, but he agreed he would come here and look at you. He wasn’t hopeful that you would be ideal for the surgery, but agreed to look you over. Ali didn’t mention any of this?”
I shook my head and felt my face flush red. I wanted to look back at Ali, but I knew I couldn’t hide my anger and confusion. I knew he would race in here and I wanted to hear what else Izem had to say.
“If things went well… If he COULD do the surgery on you, I thought we could go to Geneva for your surgery and recover there. I wanted to be the first voice you heard when it was over. I gave him all of the information just before I went to see you at the resort. That was the first time I got to talk with you. You looked so scared. I thought maybe he had told you about the surgery and you didn’t want it.”
“No,” I typed, “He didn’t mention any of it. He said you were a bad man who had many cubs and would hurt me. I didn’t even know you existed until I saw you at the resort.”
“No, Ali was supposed to tell you all about me, tell you all of the things I did to prepare for you. He told me he did that the first few days you were getting to know each other. That was what he was doing, watching you and looking out for you while I was away. Then when you got hurt, I tried to come see you. They didn’t let me in the gate. It’s why I had to sneak to see you at the resort. Ali told me you were damaged, maybe wouldn’t even walk.” Izem was getting angry. I saw a vein in his thick, muscular neck throbbing.
I reached over and touched his hand. “I’m sorry… You are hurt. He says you have many cubs in different cities. He just has me,” I typed. I couldn’t think of what to say or what to believe. It was all just two completely opposite sides of a coin I didn’t ask for.
“Many cubs? That’s not even how this works. You were to be mine! That’s what he told you? I’m afraid to ask what else he told you. So many lies, Emi. To you, to me, to the associates. He was claiming my business deals were his. It’s amazing what he will do to keep you,” Izem shook his head.
“None of this bothers you? You had EVERYTHING stolen from you. Your chance to learn, to be a normal college guy, to grow up. Didn’t you have a dream? Didn’t you ever want to be a fireman or army soldier? What about your writing? Your high school counselor said you excelled at it. Have you kept up with it? Does Ali even know the things you are good at? Does he even care?”
“He didn’t even give you a choice on your hearing loss. Doesn’t that make you wonder what he doesn’t want you to hear? Why he wants to control your information? He stole your choices, Emi and you really don’t seem upset in the least about any of it.” Izem fumed.
He looked into my eyes with confusion as though he were asking, “Is anyone in there? Anyone at home?”
“I am… upset. I just. I don’t know. This whole thing is so confusing and I don’t know what to believe or whom to trust here. Ali has been so kind to me and he’s loved me like no one ever has. He was the first to make me feel things. My heart, my skin, my… bottom. I love him so much. It’s so hard to listen to these things and believe them. It’s not the lion I know,” I typed and started to sniff back tears.
Izem reached for a box of kleenex from the side table and handed one to me. I blew my nose and wiped the few tears away. He held up another and dabbed at my cheek. I was sure Ali was behind me, ready to break the glass. I didn’t dare turn to look.
“I don’t want to upset you,” Izem began, “That’s not what I’m here to do. Look… You love him. I lost that battle before I even got a chance to fight. I could have made you so happy and you me. It’s not hard to see why you didn’t even last a week without me here. You are so beautiful, little one. If it weren’t him, someone else would have stolen you.”
“Your heart is his, and honestly, he is crazy about you. I have seen him go through boys like… this tissue,” Izem picked up my used kleenex and tossed it to the trash. “But with you he seems transformed, protective, tamed. It’s honestly the first time I’ve ever seen him in love. We grew up together… used to be best friends. I didn’t think anyone could ever tame him. There is a bond between you two that I envy. And worse because it should have been mine…”
He turned back to me sadly, “I’m not here asking you to choose me. That wouldn’t be fair and I can see that fight is useless. I’m asking you to choose yourself. Stand up and if you need to, I will be there to help you do it. Choose Emerson.”
“Right now your world is so simple, so controlled,” he continued. “It feels great right now to be adored and provided for. You’re so young and it seems so simple. Everything is right in place forever and always… But the more of yourself you give away, the fewer options you have when you’re older. Cubs grow up, sweet one. No one is a puppy forever. What will you have then? No education, no job skills, no options. Will it be enough then to just be his houseboy who raises his children and says yes because he has lost memory of the word no?”
“Yes, Emi, I would have loved to be your man, to raise you properly and help you grow. I would have done everything that didn’t hold you back. I would have disciplined you like a proper cub but also built you up to know your value, seek your passions… But you already chose Ali. I can see that plainly. I can’t change that. I wouldn’t want to disrupt your happiness. But please, don’t forget to also choose Emi,” Izem finished.
I nodded. I was numb. An information bomb had been dropped on my candy land and I needed to process it. I drew my knees up into my chest and wrapped my arms around my legs. I felt my heart pumping in my ear and read the last line several times in my head.
“Oh! I almost forgot!” Izem said with a sudden smile as he grabbed my hand excitedly. That apparently drew another angry knock on the glass from Ali because I saw Izem jolt and give an annoyed look over his left shoulder.
He rolled his eyes and gave me a wink. He reached for the box again and pulled out a small, wrapped gift. “This belongs to you. I wrapped it just so Ali could see you open a gift from me and burn with jealousy,” He said with a laugh.
I carefully peeled at the wrapping and found a brown paper box. Inside was a small, faded blue stuffed bear. It was about three inches long and had a broken keychain attached to its head. It felt like it was stuffed with little bean pellets. On its chest it had the LA Dodgers logo.
I turned it over in my hand and then caught sight of the made in China tag. Over it in permanent marker was written, “EAK.” My initials brought back a flood of memories.
When I was younger, I was assigned one of those “big brothers”, a volunteer mentor named Mark. He was a college student and learning sign language. I didn’t understand my feelings for him, but now I could sort out that I had a gigantic crush. He was older, athletic, and treated me like the big brother I’d always wanted.